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Joy, the secret to changing your life

When I begin working with clients, one of the first questions I invariably ask is, “what do you do for fun?” It sounds trite. It seems like one of those throw away questions that we ask to make lively small talk at a cocktail party. The truth is, the answer to this question has an incredible impact on your life. We’ll get into why, but before we do, take a moment to answer the question for yourself.

Okay, now that you’ve got an answer, let’s explore why our fun matters so much? Let me start with my own story.

Once upon a time there was a young professional woman. She graduated from college and began her career in the humanitarian aid sector as a fundraiser. She loved her work. Her nights and weekends were spent with friends, her then husband, and her dogs. She loved adventures in nature, dancing, travel, and socializing. Throughout the next decade, she found lots of ways to have fun. She traveled to four continents, she spent her Sunday mornings in a jazz dance class with her cousin, she spent most Saturday nights out dancing. She studied hard, worked hard, and played hard. But, all was not right. Her husband was not a fit. Her whirl of social life was becoming too much. She was ready for change.

Fast forward. In her thirties, she moved to a spiritual community, developed a daily meditation practice, married a loving man, and had two babies. She didn’t dance anymore. Her career became secondary. She didn’t have dogs anymore. Her babies were amazing, but she was constantly exhausted and had no time to care for herself. She tried to workout, but it was so boring. Her only motivation to get on the treadmill was the chance to listen to her dance music in solitude. Life was rich with love, but progressively heavy. Finances were tight. The weight of duty began to drag her down.

As her thirties came to a close, her second marriage became strained. Her career hit a dead end. The pandemic hit. She was laid off. Her life, it seemed, was unraveling again. She surrendered her worries and embraced the pause. She embraced her motherhood. She took her kids outside and they began to spend time with animals again.

And then it happened. She sat on a horse and remembered JOY. She remembered freedom. She remembered courage. The joy of the horse brought her back to herself, her heart, her inner peace. The rest, my friends, is the history of recent years. The blossoming of new life, new career, new wisdom, new purpose.

And now you.

What do you enJOY? What in your life brings you into that frequency? I’m not talking about the ways you disconnect, fill space, zone out. I’m talking about the things you do that bring excitement, enthusiasm, action? What do you do without hesitation? What do you do that moves your body without having to call on your willpower to do it?

Not all joy comes from physical movement. But, I invite you to focus on that and I’ll explain why. Ask yourself, “What brings me joy in action, in movement?” It’s not that physical movement is a requirement for this work, but it’s something to think deeply about.

Here’s why: when we fully engage in the frequency of joy on the physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual levels at once, we are acting in complete alignment internally and externally. There is an incredible power in this level of alignment. It can be the catalyst for tectonic shifts in our life.

Now that you know this, what will you do? If you want to see change in your life, then prioritize joy. Spend time in it’s vibration. Choose to do the things that bring you joy. There’s more to it, but this is the most powerful first step you can take.

Much love,


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